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CRSR
°Hits Moi!°

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: The 'Knife
Posts: 4727

don't you let your kids do it?

too much ocd i guess

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Old Post 11-22-2012 01:27 AM
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CRSR
°Hits Moi!°

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: The 'Knife
Posts: 4727

as kids we always put the fake tree up and decorated it how ever we wanted.

then again...

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Old Post 11-22-2012 01:29 AM
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karen
Lesser Satan

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 16643

Yes, my kids are the ones who put most of the ornaments on there.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 02:41 AM
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creepy uncle
Anal oops

Registered: Apr 2006
Location: behind you
Posts: 16638

quote:
Originally posted by magnolia
well, i didn't see any suspicious lump, although i am sure someone here with chop skillz will show me exactly what i missed.


If my doodle-do is so small, you won't mind me feeding it into your anus area. I can do that for you.

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quote:
Originally posted by creepy uncle
My anus is bleeding.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 03:43 AM
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magnolia
playground monitor

Registered: May 2008
Location:
Posts: 5536

it must be an extraordinary doodah if it can reach from oz to south louisiana.

but if you're gonna try that stunt, better bring a bag lunch and a miner's cap because my ass is big enough to have its own zip code.

Last edited by magnolia on 11-22-2012 at 04:42 AM

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Old Post 11-22-2012 04:36 AM
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J E B Stuart
Administrator

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 32601

quote:
Originally posted by magnolia
... bring a bag lunch and a miner's cap because my ass is big enough to have its own zip code.

Well cher, an ass that spectacular deserves it's own song:



Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 11-22-2012 05:55 AM
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Pinecrika
Muffer's He-beast

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 19810

quote:
Originally posted by magnolia
i'm kind of a grinch..


Grinches Unite!

Last year we had a potted palm as a tree but we don't have that palm anymore.

__________________
"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba

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Old Post 11-22-2012 10:41 AM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

quote:
Originally posted by magnolia
i looked at the bucket picture...but i had to increase my zoom to 150 to see what y'all were concerned about.

we usually get the charlies brown tree a couple of days before christmas. i'm kind of a grinch...but lil blossom still wants a tree and to believe in the fat man.



Charlie Brown Christmas trees remind me of the farm I grew up on when I was young.We'd spend hours in the field looking for the perfect spruce.Of course that never happened as we all had a different idea of what the tree should look like.We always ended up with a full in the front bald in the back tree. It wasn't 'pretty' per se but we tried. At least the house smelled nice.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 12:15 PM
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SimpleSimon
Dead Horse Rider

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 28687

We usually didn't bother with a tree, growing up. One year, however, my g'mother was coming to stay 2 weeks at christmas, so my parents decided we had to get a tree to avoid the bitching. The house we lived in had 12 foot ceilings, and Dad cut a beautiful white fir in the woodlot and dragged it to the house. Getting it into the living room was a hell of a chore, and once in it filled half the room. So, Dad got the pruning shears and trimmed limbs until it fit into a square corner. We only decorated the visible face of it.

Grandma was appalled.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 02:29 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

The holidays always provoke great memories don't they?

My Dad once couldn't get our tree to stand straight so he took some twine,roped it around the tree then fastened it to the floor. Looking back,it was hilarious but back then it was so embarrassing! We even decorated the twine with tinsel so it would look less obvious which of course didn't work.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 02:35 PM
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karen
Lesser Satan

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 16643

great stories, y'all

I don't have much in the way of tree disasters. we had a room in the house with a tall ceiling, so height was never an issue. We usually would replant our trees in the backyard after the holiday. I think a tree may have died one year, so we couldn't replant it. That may be the worst of it.

My mom was really good about making sure any "disasters" never were apparent to me and my brother, because I can't think of any. She is pretty OCD about things herself, but she never had the obsession with symmetry and placement that I have.

I do remember my mom being PISSED one year when we had our annual get-together at my grandmother's house(where everyone was responsible for bringing a dish), and my uncle's wife brought mashed potatoes she made from a box, instead of from scratch.

Granted, they were dry, tasteless, and mealy... but it was pretty hilarious to see how angry the adult women were over it.

I don't think anyone actually said anything to my aunt, but they sure talked about it every time she left the room.
Really, the poor lady couldn't win. Most years, she did the pumpkin pie, and always burnt them.
She definitely wasn't a cook, and I always felt a little sorry for how they tore her apart behind her back every year.

Last edited by karen on 11-22-2012 at 03:32 PM

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Old Post 11-22-2012 02:52 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

Haha! I have an Aunt like that too. And you're right,it's amazing how uppity and angry my other Aunts and Mother would become. She'd bring something a little out of the ordinary,like Mac and cheese made from a box. lol she said it was 'kid' friendly. I won't even mention how they'd gossip about who was revealing too much skin or who was flaunting their designer bags or clothes.

I'm sure I'll have a great story by the end of the evening as my sister is brining the turkey. It didn't go over very well with a few of the old school members of our family.It's also possible things could go horribly wrong when members of my family find out my oldest sister just spent 10,000 on her sick 8 year old dog after asking another family member for money to buy a hot water heater.It's sad to say but I'm glad I'm not on anyone's shit list this year.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 03:18 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

That being said,I could possibly be on their shit list by Christmas

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Old Post 11-22-2012 03:18 PM
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karen
Lesser Satan

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 16643

groups of women are always good for a laugh. Anyone who didn't show up for our family get-togethers knew that they would be the one that got talked about that year.
It's probably like that in your family, too, right? lol

I have a feeling this knowledge is directly responsible for my preference for male friends.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 03:30 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

omg yes! And I agree with about the male friends.I prefer them as well.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 03:34 PM
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Coincidence
Counterfeit

Registered: Apr 2004
Location: Sun
Posts: 33004

Last year's tree.

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You're in the wrnght place.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 05:40 PM
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Mister Freign
Population Surplus

Registered: Aug 2006
Location: Happytown
Posts: 7860

I remember staring up at mom's birdhouse-themed xmas lights and sort of tripping on the glow and psychedelia of it all, not really being 100% clear on why mom was so upset about the shooting of a "John Lennon" who was, it seems, key to her generation's youth-movement in some way. "Was he like Robert Kennedy, mom?" "[sniff, sob] sort of, honey; boo hoo"

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Old Post 11-22-2012 07:57 PM
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Pinecrika
Muffer's He-beast

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 19810

My folks still hang their tree from the ceiling rather than trying to set it in a stand. Its the only foolproof way to keep the cats from knocking it over

__________________
"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba

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Old Post 11-22-2012 08:52 PM
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Pinecrika
Muffer's He-beast

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 19810

quote:
Originally posted by karen
groups of women are always good for a laugh.


No, no they are not! Not when you're on the receiving end of their ire.

__________________
"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba

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Old Post 11-22-2012 08:54 PM
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avert_your_eyes
The Ultimate Male

Registered: Sep 2010
Location:
Posts: 3374

quote:
Originally posted by karen


I have a feeling this knowledge is directly responsible for my preference for male friends.




female friends, what a blessing.

__________________
"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem first make sure you are not, in fact, surrounded by assholes"

William Gibson

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Old Post 11-22-2012 09:07 PM
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magnolia
playground monitor

Registered: May 2008
Location:
Posts: 5536

that's funny, i have a good number of male friends too. i've never been good with the female social hierarchy thing, nor patient with the notion that women should bat their eyes and look pretty while acting dumb.

one year during the fuel embargoes, my folks closed off the formal living room and dining room during a colder-than-usual snap in mid december. the tree was already set up in the lving room. i walked in there on christmas eve when my mom ewent in to light the floor furnaces and set a fire to get it warmed up for the next morning. there was ice in the water resevoir of the tree stand....in soouth louisiana. no shit.

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Old Post 11-22-2012 11:35 PM
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lmposter
Kraft durch Freude

Registered: Dec 2005
Location: Hic et ubique
Posts: 4866








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Old Post 11-23-2012 07:41 AM
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DRZ
SS: GIFs ARE autoplays!

Registered: Jan 2011
Location:
Posts: 9451

Freezing my knackers off.

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Old Post 11-23-2012 06:43 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179



I never do anything other than silver and gold. It's looked the same for 20 years.

My Dad gave me my grandmothers ornaments to hold safe, so I decided to use them in her honor of her. I love them!

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Old Post 11-26-2012 02:10 AM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

Obviously, that's a bad edit.

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Old Post 11-26-2012 02:17 AM
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