Asylum Forums Pages (57): [1] 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 » ... Last »
Show all 1425 posts from this thread on one page

Asylum Forums (http://asylumnation.com/asylum/index.php)
- The Lost Forum (http://asylumnation.com/asylum/forumdisplay.php?forumid=3)
-- Diary Of A Whore (http://asylumnation.com/asylum/showthread.php?threadid=54490)


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 05:10 PM:

The Messenger Has Arrived!

I guess introductions are in order.
The proper rituals must be performed.

ATOM'S STANDARD FORUM INTRODUCTION:

My name is Atom.

I come unto you from the wastelands of the internet, the hidden corners and forgotten places of the electronic world we have created. This strange, anonymous place where even the worst that humanity has to offer can find a home. I come to you, like John, as a lone voice crying out from the wilderness. The words I preach upon this place are not meant for all eyes to see or all ears to hear, but for those who have the wisdom to see the truth.

There will be one among you. . . .possibly two that will heed the call and accept the invitation to join me. To help fight a never-ending battle against evil forces that plague my brothers. Forces that will never surrender, and vastly outnumber the few of us that have decided to take a stand and fight back against their overwhelming influence. A battle that will NEVER be won. Indeed, I know that already there are those who dismiss me based only on what I have written so far. I have no use for you. It is also preordained that most of the rest of those reading this will ridicule, mock, insult, ignore, and hate the truths I will proclaim unto you. Of the rest of you I have no use either. I hope I provide you with at least a few moments of entertainment, at the very least.

I speak unto you, lost ones. The few among you that truly have eyes to see and ears to hear. My fellow losers. Embrace the truth about yourself and hearken unto me for I shall show you the path that will lead you into a place that the rest dare not go. It is a harsh gospel I preach. It is The Fuckô

I am a Messenger who travels the net, always looking for a place to spread my gospel. I never am able to stay long, I usually last a few weeks on forums, with few exceptions. However, if I can reach just that person I seek, my job is done.

The enemy I and my brothers fight against is one that you know well:
Bitches.
As far as I am concerned, the only things women are good for are working to keep our economy going, and fucking. There, that being said right up front so any bitches (male or female) can get the fuck out of this post so I can get down to starting to spread my filth to those of you with the balls to remain. All cunts out? Okay then. . . .


Please allow me to start my stay on this forum, however long it may be by directing you to my journal or "blog" for those who only speak internet ebonics. I do this as a favor to you here. I am so fucking long-winded that I am quite sure you do not want me to go over everything.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
I'm not sure if I can post links here, so just look for the blog in my profile.
(Yes, I know I donít update it as much as I should)

Once you have stopped clawing at your eyes, read the second post, or the one dated 9/14, don't worry, the madness will pass.
What I have given you is a gift, a way to fight, and the knowledge that your are not alone, my fellow losers.
There is no cost, nothing to download, no e-mail adresses or registration. It's just fucking BLOGGER!
Give me some fucking credit. It is justice I am after.

Now some of you are laughing at my loser ass and my long fucking post. Of course you are all internet studs with arms like tree trunks, a 14-inch cock, and the face of a god.
"I don't need YOUR fucking scam to get laid. . . .I'm a studly manly-man and the ladies love my cock.", You mock..
Will you kindly step the fuck out of my post?

This is not for you. This is for the guy whose grandma gets laid more than him. This shit I preach is for the losers, of which I freely admit I am one. It is a gift to the guy who the bitches ignore. It is a gift for the guy sitting at his computer on a Saturday night. It is a gift for those who have been traded in for someone "better". It is a gift for those who, like me, are not the good-looking guy who gets the bitches, who may be a little overweight, or any other reason that you are passed over by bitches as they seek their "perfect" man.

Consider this, my lost bretheren: If you arenít getting laid. . . .Why not? Is it YOUR choice not to have sex? Did you just decide one day that you donít want to fuck? Donít you deserve to obey your biological imperative to mate with a female? Why should you be ignored while fucking bitches seek someone "better" than you? Like I said before, this war will never be won. But SOMEONE has to show the bitches that not all men are to be picked and chosen over like dogs in a window. SOMEONE needs to show some bitches the same kind of misery that they inflict upon us. Even if it is only a few bitches who are taught this lesson. They who are taught will remember and tell others, whispering their shame and warnings to their sister bitches.

Who among you has the balls to take your shit-talking to the next level? Can you take your verbal skills and quick thinking off the internet and onto the streets? Can you make a bitch miserable, make her do whatever you want, and then tell the world about it? Put yourself to the test, brothers!

I seek only the worst among you to help me in my quest to bring justice to the fucking bitches of the world. Of course, eventually I will continue down my path to the next dusthole in the internet wasteland, but hopefully not before I have accomplished what I have set out to do. . .to find that ONE person here that I am speaking to.

I am like Moses. . . .I will lead your fucking losers to the promised land of pussy.
Amen.















this message has been brought to you by The Fuckô Ministries, a non-profit organization, meaning the bitches don't get paid. All donations will be returned except those that are not. If you do decide to send me money send plenty of it. . .Xbox 360 games are fucking expensive! all bitches owned by Atom are at least 18 years of age. . .at least that's what they say. amen.

__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by Mugtoe on 06-12-2007 05:18 PM:

post a pic of yourself and you'll be partially forgiven

__________________

quote:
Originally posted by Smug Git
The brotherhood of melon loving will save us all, I am sure of it.


Posted by Mugtoe on 06-12-2007 05:27 PM:

and if you think you're long-winded you need to stick around here a bit

__________________

quote:
Originally posted by Smug Git
The brotherhood of melon loving will save us all, I am sure of it.


Posted by MrBig on 06-12-2007 05:48 PM:

shit... i didn't even make it through the first paragraph

__________________

Don't let the bastards grind you down.


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 07:18 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Mugtoe
post a pic of yourself and you'll be partially forgiven


__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by dogcow on 06-12-2007 07:21 PM:

hint: if you're writing long posts try to make them funny or interesting to prevent reader fatigue, general boredom and unicorn heart pernts.

works with short posts too.

__________________

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." ~ Castaneda


Posted by Hawley Griffin on 06-12-2007 07:33 PM:

i have placed you on ignore already

__________________

"too many people have opinions on things they know nothting about. and the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have."
-euphorbia


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 07:46 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Hawley Griffin
i have placed you on ignore already


Then I guess you won't be able to see me tell you to fuck off.
__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 07:48 PM:

Come forth, my lost brothers who dwell in this place!

Come forth and hear ye the Message! It is a Message of hope for the hopeless. . .a gospel for the unbeliever! A path of darkness leading to thy lost purpose!

Come unto the altar and gather close, for ye are now in the presence of The Fuckô!

Ask thy questions! Those that are serious will be answered, those that are stupid will be mocked.

Amen.

__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by Mugtoe on 06-12-2007 07:57 PM:

you're never able to stay long?

why is that? too edgy?

__________________

quote:
Originally posted by Smug Git
The brotherhood of melon loving will save us all, I am sure of it.


Posted by Trenchant_Troll on 06-12-2007 08:00 PM:

Well, atom certainly offers some explanation as to why central Florida sucks so much.

__________________

I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.


Posted by Cockney_Rebel on 06-12-2007 08:06 PM:

You preach The Fuck, yet I say "What the fuck?"

Fucking loon.


Posted by TheInfiniteJest on 06-12-2007 08:10 PM:

Question: Will you be keeping this up for long?


Posted by dogcow on 06-12-2007 08:10 PM:

so, atom, you found the asylum and instantly thought, 'wow, this place still uses the same forum software like back in 1994 when the net was still cool. it's just so different and fresh, but still completely the same! i must register now and post about crack head bitches!'?

__________________

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." ~ Castaneda


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 08:14 PM:

For some forums, yes. Most of the time, I find myself gone within a matter of days, if not within the first day. I've learned to pick a little more carefully, but it still happens.
On some, I end up getting into "debates" with bitches and they run crying "asshole" to the mods.
Still others think I am there merely to drive traffic to my websites. . .even though they are just blogs and I make no profit in any way.
Troll is another name that is applied to me often before I am kicked out. Thinking I am there as a joke, trying to lure people someplace to get a chuckle at their expense with my buddies on another forum.

I am here seeking my lost brothers.
Amen.

__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by TheInfiniteJest on 06-12-2007 08:23 PM:

Trying to troll the Asylum is like trying to headbutt mist. Good luck with that.


Posted by dogcow on 06-12-2007 08:24 PM:

i like it how even that reply was copy/pasted from somewhere. you need to take my previous advice, urgently.

__________________

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." ~ Castaneda


Posted by Pinecrika on 06-12-2007 08:25 PM:

Re: The Messenger Has Arrived!

quote:
Originally posted by atom
.I will lead your fucking losers to the promised land of pussy.
Amen.





I was going to ignore the guy till he promised that.
__________________

"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 08:26 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by TheInfiniteJest
Question: Will you be keeping this up for long?


I will be here until my purpose has been fulfilled, or until I get bored. . .whichever comes first. Unless I get tossed before either happens, but from reading the FAQ I think that might not happen easily.
__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 08:28 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by dogcow
i like it how even that reply was copy/pasted from somewhere. you need to take my previous advice, urgently.


That one wasn't actually. But I get the same questions often so you might have seen a similar answer elsewhere I have been.

The only person I copy from is myself.
__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by atom on 06-12-2007 08:30 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by TheInfiniteJest
Trying to troll the Asylum is like trying to headbutt mist. Good luck with that.


I was wondering who would be first.
Preaching is nothing if not predictable. . .
__________________

All truth passes through three stages. First it is ridiculed. Second it is violently opposed. Third it is accepted as being self-evident. --Schopenhauer.


Posted by SocialParasite on 06-12-2007 08:30 PM:

HI, IíM GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MENíS WAREHOUSE. YOUR MOTHER MAY HAVE BEEN BLESSED MORE TIMES BY THE SACRED WHITE RIVER OF MY PELVIC PALADIN, BUT THAT IS NO REASON TO GIVE ME THE GREEN EYE OF JEALOUSY, MY COCK-LOVING CAVALIER. BETWEEN US, TONIGHT WILL BE RELIGIOUS RAPTURE, FOR YOUR ANAL CLEFT SHALL BE MY GREAT SEA, AND I SHALL BE ITS MOSES, CLEAVING ITS MIGHTY CHOCOLATE OCEAN TO MAKE WAY FOR THE SAFE PASSAGE OF MY TESTICULAR TRIBE, HAVING BEEN GRANTED MEPHITIC FREEDOM FROM THE TYRANNY OF ENSLAVEMENT BEHIND A LOCKED PROSTATE. TO DO THIS, I WILL READY MY LONGIUS TO PIERCE YOUR BACKSIDEíS SACRED DOMAIN ó YOU WILL SCREAM FIRST IN PAIN, THEN IN PASSION AS ITS STEEL-LADEN GIRTH STRETCHES AND RIPS THE FABRIC OF YOUR MORTAL INNARDS, DISIMBUING YOU OF YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, LEADING YOU TO A HEAVEN, THEN REVIVING YOUR FEELING OF PHYSICAL REALITY LIKE A ONCE-CRUCIFIED JESUS RETURNING TO EARTH. I GUARANTEE IT.

__________________


Posted by dogcow on 06-12-2007 08:30 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by atom
The only person I copy from is myself.


yeah, that's what i meant.
__________________

"The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." ~ Castaneda


Posted by fubar on 06-12-2007 08:34 PM:

I always wondered who would fill in Cherry's shoes.


Posted by Pinecrika on 06-12-2007 08:36 PM:

Tell me more about this promised land of pussy. Do they take Visa?

__________________

"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba


All times are GMT. The time now is 12:13 AM. Pages (57): [1] 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 » ... Last »
Show all 1425 posts from this thread on one page

Powered by: vBulletin Version 2.2.8
Copyright © Jelsoft Enterprises Limited 2000 - 2002.
Copyright © 2014- Imaginet Inc.
[Legal Notice] | [Privacy Policy] | [Site Index]