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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879
How to iron a uniform (for morg)

Ok, Morg, first thing you need to know about the uniforms you're getting is that they are made of some kind of polyester blend. This means you can melt them with the iron if you're not careful. On the working blue uniform this leaves shiny sections which make you look all jacked up. Just use lots of steam.

Basically, what you're going to do is put two creases down the front and three in the back, and iron a crease down each sleave as well.

Things to avoid:
- "Railroad tracks" - where you go over the same crease twice, but the second time you're a bit off, so now you have two parallel lines

- Having creases that are pointing off in some weird direction. They should be straight up and down and should line up with the creases in your pants.

So. To start: here is my working blue uniform, which I have just got out of the laundry.

Attachment: uniform001.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:27 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

First thing to do is turn it inside out and iron the entire thing flat. Pay attention to the shoulders and the bit of cloth your buttons go through--these parts always end up looking a bit wrinkly.

Attachment: uniform002.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:28 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

To make the creases in the front, first fold the front right side in half so that the pocket is cut in half vertically.
Make sure that the crease is exactly in the center of the pocket, and iron it in.

Attachment: uniform005.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:29 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

When people look at you, they are going to notice the creases on your pocket and above your chest the most, so it's important not to screw this part up.

Next unfold the shirt and lay it flat on the ironing board. Find a point on the bottom edge which lines up with the crease you just made in the pocket (it is easier to just measure over from the middle edge with your hand, or guesstimate.

Find the other point above the pocket.

Attachment: uniform006.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:30 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Pinch those spots and carefully fold the shirt over again. It will want to fall off the ironing board so hold it down.

(sorry this shot is so blurry)

Repeat all of the above with the other side.

Attachment: uniform007.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:32 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Next up, time to iron creases in the back.

The center crease needs to be dead center down the back. The easiest way I have found to find this spot is to pinch the shit by the collar points and by the bottom...

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:34 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

...And then flip it over.

Attachment: uniform010.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:35 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Iron over this crease and you have the first one done.

Attachment: uniform011.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:35 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

The other two creases in the back are supposed to start halfway between the center and the shoulder seam and run parallel with the center crease. You can just eyeball it.

Attachment: uniform012.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:36 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Ironing the sleeves is easy.

Attachment: uniform008.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:37 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Next it's time to affix your medals and ribbons and other such chest candy to your uniform. I recommend you get some backing because it will keep your decorations from just sagging there and making you look like a dirtbag. They sell litte polystyrene strips at the NEXT, but cardboard or even some wadded up paper works just fine.

Make sure that the warboard (your rack of ribbons) is centered 1/4" above the left pocket. This is about as wide as a ballpoint pen, or another ribbon. Ditto for your nametag above the left pocket.

Attachment: uniform017.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:39 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

I didn't go over pants because, frankly, if you don't know how to iron pants by now, I can't help you Just make sure that you avoid making railroad tracks. The pants will probably have permanent creases in them so you only need to make sure they're not wrinkled.

Here's the finished product:

Attachment: uniform018.jpg
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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:43 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Couple of final tips:

1. Get some shirtstays if you can find some. These are basically like elastic garters which attach your shirt to your socks. They are kind of uncomfortable to wear, will tear hear off your legs (not that I'm implying you have hairy legs, Morg), and if they detach from your socks, will inevitably snap you right in the yam sack. Or, in your case, the bacon sammitch area. But, on the plus side, you look a lot sharper if your shirt stays tucked in.

2. If you find out you're about to get inspected, first thing you do is buff your shoes off on the back of your pants, then tuck your shirt down to your knees.

I will try to make a shoe-shining guide next. If you have sharp creases and shiny shoes, nobody is going to fuck with you.

Good luck with the Sea Scouts thing, and get us pics soon.

xoxo,
Your Friendly Neighborhood Squee

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:47 AM
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Astro74
Dodging the Issues

Registered: Jun 2001
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 1145

Wow...You got one of the lame ass Surface Warfare pins???

You should try to get on a sub spec-op and work on putting some dolphins on your chest. If you get the right crew they will more or less give them to you.

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:48 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Yes, I was in the Surface community.

I could do direct support subs but the odds of me staying in that long are pretty low.

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:49 AM
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Astro74
Dodging the Issues

Registered: Jun 2001
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 1145

you also forget to tell her about her gig line and irish pennants.....

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:49 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

Shit, yes.

Morg--

Your gig line is the line made by the bit of shirt your buttons go through, your belt buckle, and your zipper. Basically, they all need to line up. On males the left side of the belt buckle lines up with the edge of that line.

Irish pennants are when you have stray strings and so forth hanging off of your uniform (almost always on the seams). These can be trimmed with scissors but it's usually easier to simply burn/melt them with a cigarette lighter.

Did I miss anything else, Astro?

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Old Post 02-11-2005 03:52 AM
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Astro74
Dodging the Issues

Registered: Jun 2001
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 1145

why buy shoes you have to polish...

just buy some chloroforms (I think that is what they are called). They are really shiny and all you need to do is wipe them down with some windex.....

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Old Post 02-11-2005 04:02 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

They are called corfams and they are for metrosexuals and pinko commie queers. They are always shiny but everyone knows you're just wearing plastic shoes. A good pair of polished leathers looks ten times better any day.

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Old Post 02-11-2005 04:05 AM
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loser
oxymoran

Registered: Dec 2004
Location: Beringia
Posts: 6194

quote:
Originally posted by squee
[B]They are called corfams and they are for metrosexuals and pinko commie queers. /B]

Are they expensive?

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Old Post 02-11-2005 04:11 AM
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Astro74
Dodging the Issues

Registered: Jun 2001
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 1145

wait...doesn't your apartment scream metrosexual?????? So does that mean you own a pair?

I was only going for the easy way out....Why polish when you can be out having a good time

Funny thing is I just found a pair of my dolphins and my boat belt buckle the other day....They are one of the few items I kept.

I am surprised you only have 6 ribbons...I thought they handed them out like candy in the surface fleet. Not only that shouldn't you have a bronze stare on your national defense ribbon?

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Old Post 02-11-2005 04:11 AM
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squee
the amen break

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4879

I've only been in since 2000, so, no.

Also, you don't get personal awards that much in the surface fleet. You should, but all the credit usually goes to your division chief. It's typical to get a NAM for an end-of-tour award unless you're a fuckup. Instead, most Surface types get lots of unit commendations which fills out their warboard. I will have two and 2/3 rows in a bit once I get my pistol and rifle ribbons.

Loser--
Corfams cost about $70 a pair. Leathers cost about $40.

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Old Post 02-11-2005 04:18 AM
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Paint CHiPs
Smartest Man in the World

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Location Location
Posts: 26816

quote:
Originally posted by Astro74
wait...doesn't your apartment scream metrosexual??????


You're asking a guy, in his pictoral thread about ironing, if he's a metrosexual?

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Old Post 02-11-2005 05:05 AM
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willimo
Erythrophiliac

Registered: Jan 2003
Location: mediocre apartment
Posts: 2848

Navy people and their creases.

Curious, my girlfriend and I were just mutually wondering how many uniforms the Navy has. I say 11, she says 12. How many Mr. Answerman?

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Old Post 02-11-2005 05:12 AM
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ignatz mouse
gone with the wind

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: The Wetlands
Posts: 17938

you only have 15 pieces of flair. pvt shithead over there has 36 pieces of flair. what do you have to say for yourself?

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