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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902
Need an excuse for having a black eye....

.... I woke up with it Saturday morning, I have a job interview tomorrow (Tuesday), it still shines.

I have no idea how I got it.

If I say "I have no idea how I got it" it will appear that I was too drunk to remember.

That wasn't the case.

I want the job.



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Old Post 05-23-2005 06:38 AM
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flocat
PINKO

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: East Bay
Posts: 3588

You were mugged?

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Old Post 05-23-2005 07:19 AM
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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902

Was trying to leave talk of violence out of the conversation, although maybe I could try and intimidate the geezer into employing me.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 07:30 AM
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buddha's penis
has it all

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: 0.50
Posts: 10035

you could try saying that somebody hit you in the eye by accident. or is that too easy?

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Old Post 05-23-2005 07:42 AM
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buddha's penis
has it all

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: 0.50
Posts: 10035

or, wait. you're in europe. hit by an errant ball during a bit of the footie?
you look like an athlete.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 07:43 AM
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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902

Why thank you, although I'm considering applying some cover-up make-up.......

.....just have to think of someone I know that actually uses make-up.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 07:55 AM
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towrofstgh
Yeah, I'm LF's Brother!

Registered: May 2004
Location: Kingston, New York
Posts: 911

If they ask "hey how did you get that black eye?" just say "black eye? What! How did that happen?"

__________________
How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it. - Marcus Aurelius

The only reason why LF looks half-way cool in this picture is because our Mom and I are in it! Ha Ha Ha!!!



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Old Post 05-23-2005 11:56 AM
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Thimbles worth of opinion
Symetrically challenged

Registered: Aug 2000
Location:
Posts: 12474

Say it's a bunion. A bunion of Satan.

__________________
My nipples are asymetrical... and that's a feature not a bug.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 11:59 AM
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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44493

Just say you got hit in the eye with a racquetball or that you accidently caught a thumb in your eye while raping a nun.

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:24 PM
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Cockney_Rebel
Scarred for Life

Registered: Nov 2003
Location:
Posts: 9509

Jesus, it's that hard to make a friggin excuse? It happened while playing sunday team football in a mid-air challenge.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:30 PM
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SatansLeftHand
buttercup

Registered: Jan 2002
Location: elsewhere
Posts: 5912

"well, see. it was like this: last night night, i opened one of the cupboards in my kitchen, and apparently i did a bad job of loading it last time it was open, because this damned frying pan jumped out and attacked me."

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(sic)

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:34 PM
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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44493

quote:
Originally posted by Cockney_Rebel
Jesus, it's that hard to make a friggin excuse? It happened while playing sunday team football in a mid-air challenge.


Football? Have you seen Skalie? That would be like Keith Richards saying he was late because he had to finish a triathlon. Nope, he should go with the nun rape thing; far more believable.

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:41 PM
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zim
-

Registered: Dec 2002
Location: Boston
Posts: 3119

drunken brawl is out of the question?

__________________
insert witty remark

Last edited by CHiPsJr on 11-09-2006 at 08:23 AM

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:46 PM
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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44493

For Chrisake, zim, he's applying for a job, not proposing marriage!

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 12:50 PM
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Mess
Fluffy Bunny

Registered: Mar 2005
Location: Snoville, USA
Posts: 119

If you have a child, you can say he/she did it. I've seen it happen where an infant throws his or her head back and someone gets hit in the hose buy it and comes out with a shiner... it's possible. lol

__________________
Don't take life to seriously, no one gets out alive.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 01:15 PM
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Avondale
oh hello

Registered: Sep 2000
Location:
Posts: 8630

a woman i work with came to work the other day with a swollen black eye, and a split lip, claiming she fell out of bed. nobody believed her. so make sure your story isn't something like "i fell down some stairs"

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yours goddamn fucking truly

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Old Post 05-23-2005 01:25 PM
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SimpleSimon
Dead Horse Rider

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 28673

Still got that damned hard-headed dog? Blame him.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 01:49 PM
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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902

quote:
Originally posted by Mess
If you have a child, you can say he/she did it.


Probably the best one, score some "Father = responsible = better type of employee" type points.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:04 PM
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aminal
incomplete

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Erehwon
Posts: 7583

Say it was in your karate class or some other martial art.

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aminal
Turn sigs off

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:09 PM
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Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44493

No way, you will have sick-time written all over you.

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:09 PM
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T
tiTalating Revelator...

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Behind this monitor.
Posts: 6672

Wear your silk shirt, he'll never notice your eye.

*are you drinking again?

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:15 PM
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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902

haven't touched a drop for a fortnight

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:36 PM
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skalie
Locksmith of Lurve

Registered: Sep 2001
Location: World Citizen
Posts: 18902

.... although if I get the job I'll probably crack open the Champers still in the fridge.

I won't know that till I've done the one month proof period, however.

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Old Post 05-23-2005 02:45 PM
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Aydin
El Fugaz

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: New York City
Posts: 22907

It was going fine till he found out I was a guy.

__________________
Aydin1 on Google+

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Old Post 05-23-2005 03:25 PM
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Mudflap
I.R. Jailer

Registered: Dec 2000
Location: Smith County
Posts: 1366

"Well, you see, there's this guy named Mudflap that I like to insult behind the safety of my keyboard and monitor. I'm afraid he found me."

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Joeycat is my mom.

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