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how long until i revert to my old habits?
you're a fucking wanker, not even 24 hours
1-2 days
2-4 days
4-7 days
7-9 days
9-13 days
two weeks, i believe in you
low T
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291
herculean task

suki and i were discussing my rampant onanism and i suggested perhaps i should try and see if i could abstain from boxing the jesuit for a 2 week period.

this friday it'll be 14 days before i pick suki up from the airport and rape make sweet tender love to her.

this could be the hardest challenge i've ever set myself. i don't even know why i'm going to try. maybe the same reason people climb mountains - just because they're there.

not a day goes by when i'm not abusing myself, sometimes twice a day or even thrice. one time i broke my hand and learnt i was ambidextrous the same day.
suki says she doesn't think i'll last and i'm inclined to agree. i'm sure it keeps me centered and happy and without my daily relief i'll become intolerant and surly.



i've got 2 days till friday and i'm not at all confident. perhaps some of you think it's possible and can show some support.
vote on the poll and the closest correct answer gets a 25 game slikpik. the poll is anonymous so you'll have to comment here to be in the running.

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world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 09:14 AM
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Tefl
Reality Theorist

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: Down the rabbit hole
Posts: 8806

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Old Post 04-26-2011 09:37 AM
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FuhQall
High Flyer

Registered: Apr 2002
Location: At Home
Posts: 8349

Thou shalt not deprive thyself of relief.

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Shit, Motherfucker, Fuck, Shit!

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Old Post 04-26-2011 10:12 AM
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Muffy
Crika bait

Registered: Oct 2007
Location:
Posts: 5735

2-4 days. You'll make an honest attempt, but give in when Suki flashes you her boobs in Skype.

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I am to misbehave.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 10:22 AM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

quote:
Originally posted by FuhQall
Thou shalt not deprive thyself of relief.


register your vote or miss out on the slikpik. shall i put you down for option 1?

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 11:01 AM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

quote:
Originally posted by Muffy
2-4 days. You'll make an honest attempt, but give in when Suki flashes you her boobs in Skype.


generous of you, i think i'll last a day before the devil enters me.

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 11:04 AM
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jeremy_binx
Ex-Mormon Thank God......

Registered: Apr 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 1090

i want to see some boob flashing in skype and no you won't make it dude...

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out of the night that covers me black as the pit from pole to pole I thank whatever gods maybe for my unconquerable soul in the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody but unbowed beyond this place of wrath an tears looms but the horror of the shade an yet the menace of the years finds an shall find me unafraid it matters not how strait the gate how charged with punishments the scroll I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul

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Old Post 04-26-2011 11:09 AM
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avert_your_eyes
The Ultimate Male

Registered: Sep 2010
Location:
Posts: 3374

2 words:

No Way.

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"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem first make sure you are not, in fact, surrounded by assholes"

William Gibson

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Old Post 04-26-2011 11:10 AM
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Large Filipino
Fuck me hard in my arse.

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: in colorado somewhere!
Posts: 53134

If you just keep filling up that after dinner mints thread you may do okay....or maybe not.

__________________

I want a Trump sex doll.
I would throw it in a Orangutan enclosure
And watch the orgy.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:02 PM
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Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

I want to say 7-9 days..but I'm thinking of the first choice. I need more time to think about it

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:07 PM
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DRZ
SS: GIFs ARE autoplays!

Registered: Jan 2011
Location:
Posts: 9451

Swing a sledge hammer round to 8 hours a day ... and you physically won't be able to wank.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:09 PM
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skinny
Bone-yard

Registered: May 2006
Location:
Posts: 7081

I think you've shed your load since you started this thread...i say option 1 you wanker

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Now was that funny HAHA or funny wierd??

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:11 PM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

remember kids, without actually stating your vote here i have no way to verify your choice and you'll no receive any lotto tickets.

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:18 PM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

quote:
Originally posted by DRZ
Swing a sledge hammer round to 8 hours a day ... and you physically won't be able to wank.


my job is extremely physical drz. i still find time and energy for penis fitness every day.

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:21 PM
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Large Filipino
Fuck me hard in my arse.

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: in colorado somewhere!
Posts: 53134

Get one of those lap tops you have to crank a handle for power. Then when you watch Suki porn your hand is busy. Then when you try to let go of your other hand your laptop will go flying so you wouldn't be able to.

__________________

I want a Trump sex doll.
I would throw it in a Orangutan enclosure
And watch the orgy.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:29 PM
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Tex critter
bag of ugly

Registered: Mar 2009
Location: can I pitch a tent in your back yard?
Posts: 654

I give ya 1-2 days here a female pelvic exam video to help ya out.

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"Chance favors a prepared mind"

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:32 PM
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SimpleSimon
Dead Horse Rider

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 28691

A "Herculean" task?

More like a sisyphean task, I think.

I'll guess 4-7 days.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:40 PM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

Sinner condemned in Tartarus to an eternity of rolling a boulder uphill then watching it roll back down again. Sisyphus was founder and king of Corinth, or Ephyra as it was called in those days. He was notorious as the most cunning knave on earth. His greatest triumph came at the end of his life, when the god Hades came to claim him personally for the kingdom of the dead. Hades had brought along a pair of handcuffs, a comparative novelty, and Sisyphus expressed such an interest that Hades was persuaded to demonstrate their use - on himself.

And so it came about that the high lord of the Underworld was kept locked up in a closet at Sisyphus's house for many a day, a circumstance which put the great chain of being seriously out of whack. Nobody could die. A soldier might be chopped to bits in battle and still show up at camp for dinner. Finally Hades was released and Sisyphus was ordered summarily to report to the Underworld for his eternal assignment. But the wily one had another trick up his sleeve.

He simply told his wife not to bury him and then complained to Persephone, Queen of the Dead, that he had not been accorded the proper funeral honors. What's more, as an unburied corpse he had no business on the far side of the river Styx at all - his wife hadn't placed a coin under his tongue to secure passage with Charon the ferryman. Surely her highness could see that Sisyphus must be given leave to journey back topside and put things right.

Kindly Persephone assented, and Sisyphus made his way back to the sunshine, where he promptly forgot all about funerals and such drab affairs and lived on in dissipation for another good stretch of time. But even this paramount trickster could only postpone the inevitable. Eventually he was hauled down to Hades, where his indiscretions caught up with him. For a crime against the gods - the specifics of which are variously reported - he was condemned to an eternity at hard labor. And frustrating labor at that. For his assignment was to roll a great boulder to the top of a hill. Only every time Sisyphus, by the greatest of exertion and toil, attained the summit, the darn thing rolled back down again.

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world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:50 PM
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SimpleSimon
Dead Horse Rider

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 28691

Exactly.

Every time you "crest the hill" whilst wanking just sets you up to start climbing it again after the letdown.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 12:56 PM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 01:09 PM
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GimpyDivo
I DRIVE WOMEN CRAZY!

Registered: Oct 2002
Location:
Posts: 2684

if i can abstain for 6 weeks you can too. yes, 6 weeks. i did this when i was engaged. guess why she is an ex?

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the only way to effectively deal with the hajis is to carpet bomb mecca with bacon and porn until those little brown cocksuckers completely capitulate and piss all over themselves in a display of submission.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 01:20 PM
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karen
Lesser Satan

Registered: Jul 2000
Location:
Posts: 16643

I gave you 4-7, though the buildup may cause your body to go into shock, and immediately cause stage 4 prostate cancer.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 02:25 PM
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Brett
Say no to edit rape

Registered: Jun 2008
Location:
Posts: 20164

I predict a flood of After Dinner Mints post.

1-2 days.

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Old Post 04-26-2011 02:32 PM
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cruncle
cwuncle

Registered: May 2010
Location: perth
Posts: 6291

i hope you'll lend me brett and his spidery fingers if that happens karen. i'll need help to piss.

__________________
world's luckiest motherfuckers
Muffy $17.59 - Captain Doublestandards $11.81 - Pinecrika $10.82 - Suki $9.77 - avondale $8.87 - Vegas $7.20 - karen $6.79 - PNG $6.69 - LF $6.22 - Dingle the Dongle $5.08 - Mr Freign $4.12 - paul theo $3.79 - coincidence $3.75 - cw $3.64 - Magnolia $3.63 - JoeyCat $3.39 - T $3.06 - Mokkori $2.75 - ignatz mouse $2.47 - mudded $2.46 - fubar $2.06 - mmmtravis $2.00 - Trenchant_Troll $1.99 - SimpleSimon $1.96 - skinny $1.37 - Azbat the 4th $1.32 - Mugtoe $0.64 - Loser $0.63 - Dogcow $0.62 - XiXo $0.58 - SocialParasite $0.56 - Dacarlo $0.54 - billgerat $0.52

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Old Post 04-26-2011 02:33 PM
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Pinecrika
Muffer's He-beast

Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Aotearoa
Posts: 19810

4-7. Only because 5 was my record... My balls ached and I had to let loose, my mood was horrible...Felt like shooting a big greased marble when done (45seconds of jerky delight), ahhhhh, what relief. Beating off is good in an LDR.

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"Let Ebola decide. " ....Tuba

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Old Post 04-26-2011 02:57 PM
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