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Biohazard
Fluffy Bunny

Registered: Dec 2000
Location: London UK
Posts: 257
Talking An old joke

Ah, I just unearthed this old gem...

A young man walked into a house of ill repute on a fine day. He was a little
short of cash, so he asked for the cheapest whore they could offer. The pimp
replied, "Ok, for $20 you can have a shot at Jane here, a little old but
that's all you'll ever get for $20"
He would give everything he owned for Jane but unfortunatately all he owned
was $2, so he went on bargaining. The pimp submitted saying "ok ok, with
your $2 you can have Mona here"

The man then took Mona to the room and started to pump her. "No wonder she's
only $2, she feels like sandpaper inside". After a few forceful strokes, the
man was all sore and stopped.

"Can't you do anything about it?"he asked.
"Yup I guess I could ",she replied,"just wait a while."

He waited as she got up and left the room. After a few minutes, she returned
smiling, "OK, try me now."

So he entered her again, this time she was unbelievably smooth, and he went
on to have the best orgasm $2 could ever offer, so he asked, "What's it you
did that made you so wet and smooth... lubricants?"

"Nope.", she answered, "I just peeled off the scabs and let the pus run."


------------------

The virus of hate infects the ignorant mind

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Old Post 06-24-2001 02:37 AM
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A.D.H.D
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Van Diemen's Land.
Posts: 3607
Post

I would be hungry after reading that, only I'm badly hungover and I feel like shit.

-thanks.

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Old Post 06-24-2001 02:48 AM
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shyloh
ghost of internetz past

Registered: Aug 2000
Location: NYC
Posts: 3598
Post

That is unecessarily disgusting.

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Old Post 06-24-2001 03:05 AM
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euphorbia
caustic milk - hybrid

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: behind the irony curtain
Posts: 19147
Talking

I remember that one! Its a classic.

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Old Post 06-24-2001 04:28 AM
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urbanjunkie
23

Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Playa d'en London
Posts: 9922
Post

quote:
Originally posted by Biohazard:
Ah, I just unearthed this old gem...





please, dig a hole and bury it


------------------------
forever in a trance

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Old Post 06-24-2001 04:34 AM
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Fiend
Medically crazy

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Bangor, ME
Posts: 10608
Post

NAS-TAY!!!!!!!!

but i love it

and its not old to me

------------------------
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
-Ernest Hemingway

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Old Post 06-24-2001 04:50 AM
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euphorbia
caustic milk - hybrid

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: behind the irony curtain
Posts: 19147
Talking

I got one! I got one!

It might be hard with out the visuals so use your imagination

There was a man in the desert. He needed to get across the desert quickly. He goes to the camel rental place and tells the guy he needs a camel badly. The camel salesman says, "we are out of camels at the moment, all we have in one and trust me, its a bastard of a camel and you don’t want it. We will be getting a camel return in two days if you want to wait."
The man says, “No, this is an emergency, I need one now. Ill take what you have" The camel rental guy says, "Ok, but I’m telling you this camel is a bastard and he has special care instructions.
Follow me, Ill tell you what you have to do, then you can decide if you still want it."
So the salesman takes the man to the stable and shows him the camel. The camel looks strong and healthy and the man feels optimistic. The salesman says, "Ok, this is the only camel we have and every 50 miles he will stop and you have to jack him off (give it a hand job) or it won’t budge."
The man says" What! you’re kidding" The salesman, replies, No, I told you he was a bastard and you’ll be better off waiting for a return." The man says "Fuck it, Ill take it."
Pays the salesman, gathers his supplies, and sets off on his journey.
Everything is going smoothly until about 50 miles in the camel stops. The man gets off and tries to give it some water and food; the camel shakes his head "no" to all his efforts. Confused the man remembers the instruction, goes in front of the camel and motions a hand job, to which the camel nods "yes". Disgusted the man goes to the rear of the camel, spits on his hand and jacks the camel off. He gets back on the camel and sets off again. Another 50 miles the camel stops. Efforts to give it water and food fail again. The man walks to the front of the camel, and angrily gives the hand job motion to the camel, which the camel nods in approval to. Again, he goes to the back of the camel, spits on his hand and jacks it off. This goes on every 50 miles until they are smack in middle of the desert. The man gets off the camel, curses and kicks the sand. Real sarcastically goes to the camels face and contempt fully makes the hand job motion with his fist to which the camel shakes his head no to, lifts his front hoof and makes a blow job motion to his mouth.


So, what would you do?

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Old Post 06-24-2001 04:55 AM
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euphorbia
caustic milk - hybrid

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: behind the irony curtain
Posts: 19147
Unhappy

nobody thought my joke was funny

but......but....its a classic

[This message has been edited by euphorbia (edited 06-24-2001).]

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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:12 PM
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euphorbia
caustic milk - hybrid

Registered: Apr 2001
Location: behind the irony curtain
Posts: 19147
Wink

....

[This message has been edited by euphorbia (edited 06-24-2001).]

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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:16 PM
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A.D.H.D
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Van Diemen's Land.
Posts: 3607
Post

"Can we take the seats out of the camel, mein?"

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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:17 PM
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pj
Captain America

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: anywhere but here
Posts: 4425
Post

quote:
Originally posted by shyloh:
That is unecessarily disgusting.


i totally agree, its gross in the extreme.....ick......



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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:42 PM
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pj
Captain America

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: anywhere but here
Posts: 4425
Post

quote:
Originally posted by euphorbia:
nobody though my joke was funny

but......but....its a classic


totally didnt get it, sorry, care to explain......


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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:45 PM
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A.D.H.D
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ

Registered: Jan 2001
Location: Van Diemen's Land.
Posts: 3607
Post

quote:
Originally posted by prozacjones:
i totally agree, its gross in the extreme.....ick......



It actually had me quite hot and bothered for awhile. I love my cold showers.

------------------------

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Old Post 06-24-2001 01:50 PM
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mIsLeDyOuTh
For fucks sake, Im a girl

Registered: May 2001
Location: Standing right behind you....
Posts: 502
Post

hehehe that was funny euphoribia- sick, but funny.

------------------------
mIsLeDyOuTh<the most wonderful bitch>

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Old Post 06-24-2001 07:09 PM
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Avondale
oh hello

Registered: Sep 2000
Location:
Posts: 8630
Post

hahaha!
Those are both so sick, but funny.

------------------------
The red x will remain until Im not too lazy to fix it.

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Old Post 06-24-2001 07:16 PM
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River Rat
Resident Rodent

Registered: Nov 2000
Location: Oregon
Posts: 33
Post

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....................

dammit now stop it your killing me

------------------------
Fucking Hostile........

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Old Post 06-24-2001 07:41 PM
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Biohazard
Fluffy Bunny

Registered: Dec 2000
Location: London UK
Posts: 257
Talking

quote:
Originally posted by prozacjones:

totally didnt get it, sorry, care to explain......



The camel wants the man to give him a blow job. Especially considering his predicament.

------------------------

The virus of hate infects the ignorant mind

[This message has been edited by Biohazard (edited 06-24-2001).]

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Old Post 06-24-2001 08:03 PM
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