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Large Filipino
Fuck me hard in my arse.

Registered: Feb 2004
Location: in colorado somewhere!
Posts: 53131

I pee a lot too. That rules.

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I want a Trump sex doll.
I would throw it in a Orangutan enclosure
And watch the orgy.

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Old Post 03-12-2019 12:51 AM
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GoFuckYourselves!
#1 Asylum Dumbfuck!

Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
Posts: 17635

I just hope not when you're sleeping. Otherwise, you might float out onto the street and down the Colorado River and we'd never hear from you again.

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Old Post 03-13-2019 01:50 AM
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J E B Stuart
Administrator

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 33600

A man received the following text from his neighbor:

I am so sorry, Bob. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife all the time. I'm not getting any at my house, but that's no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology, along with my promise that it won't happen again.

The man, feeling anguished and betrayed, went into his bedroom, grabbed his gun and, without a word, shot his wife and killed her.

A few moments later, a second text message arrived:

Damn spell-check. I meant "wifi", not "wife".

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-14-2019 07:35 AM
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J E B Stuart
Administrator

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: Beyond Mason-Dixon Line
Posts: 33600

My pregnant wife sent me a selfie in a new dress and asked if it made her butt look big. I texted back NOOOO. Auto predict sent MOOOO. Please send help.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-16-2019 06:13 AM
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GoFuckYourselves!
#1 Asylum Dumbfuck!

Registered: Oct 2000
Location: Dumbfucksville!
Posts: 17635

The inventor of autocorrect died today.

His funfair will be hello on sundial.

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Old Post 03-17-2019 04:03 PM
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