The Asylum   Search Private Messages Options Blogs Images Chat Cam Portals Calendar FAQ's Join  
Asylum Forums : Powered by vBulletin version 2.2.8 Asylum Forums > The Lost Forum > Let's play a game called "Should I hit it?"
Pages (2): [1] 2 »   Last Thread   Next Thread
Author
Thread [new thread]    [post reply]
mmmtravis
stealthy ninja

Registered: May 2002
Location:
Posts: 12286
Let's play a game called "Should I hit it?"

Okay. So this free online dating site I belong to gets me a lot of strange e-mail -- especially since I changed my preferences to allow females to contact me for "discrete encounters."

This whale of a woman sent me a message today. She told me she liked my profile, she said she lives nearby, and that she wants to meet up for sex. The message included these unsolicited pictures, asking only that I send her a picture of my cock in return (with or without a stuffed animal around it, I guess):


MAN THE HARPOONS.


How do I respond? Should I meet up with her? Should I hit it? Should I poop on her chest and use a stylus to paint a portrait of moop so I can post the pictures on here?

I'm not desperate enough for sex to fuck her, but I am a little desperate for excitement, and finding a super ugly girl that might let me video tape myself pissing in her eye is kind of exciting, right?

Man, if I were as attractive as BP, the chicks sending me these e-mails would be smokin' hot.

__________________
picture unrelated

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:27 PM
mmmtravis is offline Click Here to See the Profile for mmmtravis Click here to Send mmmtravis a Private Message Visit mmmtravis's homepage! Find more posts by mmmtravis Add mmmtravis to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
creepy uncle
Anal oops

Registered: Apr 2006
Location: behind you
Posts: 16638

her tits are rubbish

__________________
quote:
Originally posted by creepy uncle
My anus is bleeding.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:29 PM
creepy uncle is offline Click Here to See the Profile for creepy uncle Click here to Send creepy uncle a Private Message Find more posts by creepy uncle Add creepy uncle to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
DRZ400
Wank monkey

Registered: May 2008
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 7702

MUM ... GOD DAMMIT.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:31 PM
DRZ400 is offline Click Here to See the Profile for DRZ400 Click here to Send DRZ400 a Private Message Find more posts by DRZ400 Add DRZ400 to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
mmmtravis
stealthy ninja

Registered: May 2002
Location:
Posts: 12286

quote:
Originally posted by creepy uncle
her tits are rubbish
I honestly can't tell areola from acne.

__________________
picture unrelated

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:36 PM
mmmtravis is offline Click Here to See the Profile for mmmtravis Click here to Send mmmtravis a Private Message Visit mmmtravis's homepage! Find more posts by mmmtravis Add mmmtravis to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
mmmtravis
stealthy ninja

Registered: May 2002
Location:
Posts: 12286

If my dick were like 10% smaller, I think I could fuck her bellybutton.

__________________
picture unrelated

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:37 PM
mmmtravis is offline Click Here to See the Profile for mmmtravis Click here to Send mmmtravis a Private Message Visit mmmtravis's homepage! Find more posts by mmmtravis Add mmmtravis to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
creepy uncle
Anal oops

Registered: Apr 2006
Location: behind you
Posts: 16638

__________________
quote:
Originally posted by creepy uncle
My anus is bleeding.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-22-2009 10:44 PM
creepy uncle is offline Click Here to See the Profile for creepy uncle Click here to Send creepy uncle a Private Message Find more posts by creepy uncle Add creepy uncle to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
GimpyDivo
I DRIVE WOMEN CRAZY!

Registered: Oct 2002
Location:
Posts: 2684

dont do it boy!

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:12 AM
GimpyDivo is offline Click Here to See the Profile for GimpyDivo Click here to Send GimpyDivo a Private Message Find more posts by GimpyDivo Add GimpyDivo to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
ignatz mouse
gone with the wind

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: The Wetlands
Posts: 17938

Crika will hit that. Also, you can post these in his masturbation thread.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:25 AM
ignatz mouse is offline Click Here to See the Profile for ignatz mouse Click here to Send ignatz mouse a Private Message Find more posts by ignatz mouse Add ignatz mouse to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Sookee
good luck with that.

Registered: Mar 2007
Location:
Posts: 7179

I say go for it. You never know,you might actually have a good time.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:31 AM
Sookee is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Sookee Click here to Send Sookee a Private Message Find more posts by Sookee Add Sookee to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
DRZ400
Wank monkey

Registered: May 2008
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 7702

mmmtravis ... how heavy are you?

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:37 AM
DRZ400 is offline Click Here to See the Profile for DRZ400 Click here to Send DRZ400 a Private Message Find more posts by DRZ400 Add DRZ400 to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
ignatz mouse
gone with the wind

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: The Wetlands
Posts: 17938

He should post a pic of his moobs so we can compare.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:47 AM
ignatz mouse is offline Click Here to See the Profile for ignatz mouse Click here to Send ignatz mouse a Private Message Find more posts by ignatz mouse Add ignatz mouse to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
DRZ400
Wank monkey

Registered: May 2008
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 7702

+1

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 12:51 AM
DRZ400 is offline Click Here to See the Profile for DRZ400 Click here to Send DRZ400 a Private Message Find more posts by DRZ400 Add DRZ400 to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Brett
Say no to edit rape

Registered: Jun 2008
Location:
Posts: 20164

No. The Asylum does not need a Travis sex video.


or maybe it does. Could be funny.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 01:00 AM
Brett is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Brett Click here to Send Brett a Private Message Find more posts by Brett Add Brett to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
DRZ400
Wank monkey

Registered: May 2008
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 7702

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 01:06 AM
DRZ400 is offline Click Here to See the Profile for DRZ400 Click here to Send DRZ400 a Private Message Find more posts by DRZ400 Add DRZ400 to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
DRZ400
Wank monkey

Registered: May 2008
Location: Under a bridge
Posts: 7702

It could be beautiful.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 01:08 AM
DRZ400 is offline Click Here to See the Profile for DRZ400 Click here to Send DRZ400 a Private Message Find more posts by DRZ400 Add DRZ400 to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Avondale
oh hello

Registered: Sep 2000
Location:
Posts: 8630

don't do it, travis. you'll end up hating yourself the next morning. bros don't let bros bang whales

__________________
yours goddamn fucking truly

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 01:17 AM
Avondale is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Avondale Click here to Send Avondale a Private Message Find more posts by Avondale Add Avondale to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
SimpleSimon
Dead Horse Rider

Registered: Dec 2002
Location:
Posts: 28687

"If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, ..."

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 01:28 AM
SimpleSimon is offline Click Here to See the Profile for SimpleSimon Click here to Send SimpleSimon a Private Message Find more posts by SimpleSimon Add SimpleSimon to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
mmmtravis
stealthy ninja

Registered: May 2002
Location:
Posts: 12286

Is there no in between?

__________________
picture unrelated

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 02:23 AM
mmmtravis is offline Click Here to See the Profile for mmmtravis Click here to Send mmmtravis a Private Message Visit mmmtravis's homepage! Find more posts by mmmtravis Add mmmtravis to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Brett
Say no to edit rape

Registered: Jun 2008
Location:
Posts: 20164

Travis should not hit it because he is not black.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 02:33 AM
Brett is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Brett Click here to Send Brett a Private Message Find more posts by Brett Add Brett to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
jazebelle
Ms Sayang

Registered: Dec 2006
Location: In an apartment
Posts: 4768

Just have phone sex with her...not that I'm a fan of phone sex at all! But you wanted an 'inbetween'

__________________
That brown girl

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 02:59 AM
jazebelle is offline Click Here to See the Profile for jazebelle Click here to Send jazebelle a Private Message Find more posts by jazebelle Add jazebelle to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44529

quote:
Originally posted by Sookee
I say go for it. You never know,you might actually have a good time.


I concur. After all, Travis has spent a fair amount of his recent existence trying to out-swim the harpoons launched from the Pequod of his own indulgences.

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 04:29 AM
Trenchant_Troll is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Trenchant_Troll Click here to Send Trenchant_Troll a Private Message Find more posts by Trenchant_Troll Add Trenchant_Troll to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
jeremy_binx
Ex-Mormon Thank God......

Registered: Apr 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 1090

i am on dial up fuckers and when it loaded it shocked me...........

__________________
out of the night that covers me black as the pit from pole to pole I thank whatever gods maybe for my unconquerable soul in the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody but unbowed beyond this place of wrath an tears looms but the horror of the shade an yet the menace of the years finds an shall find me unafraid it matters not how strait the gate how charged with punishments the scroll I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 04:52 AM
jeremy_binx is offline Click Here to See the Profile for jeremy_binx Click here to Send jeremy_binx a Private Message Find more posts by jeremy_binx Add jeremy_binx to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Trenchant_Troll
ad hominid

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 44529

If you are on dial-up, you should be dead. Natural selection, web style.

__________________
I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 05:36 AM
Trenchant_Troll is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Trenchant_Troll Click here to Send Trenchant_Troll a Private Message Find more posts by Trenchant_Troll Add Trenchant_Troll to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
jeremy_binx
Ex-Mormon Thank God......

Registered: Apr 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 1090

i'll dial-up your sisters phone number and she will answer...........

__________________
out of the night that covers me black as the pit from pole to pole I thank whatever gods maybe for my unconquerable soul in the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud under the bludgeonings of chance my head is bloody but unbowed beyond this place of wrath an tears looms but the horror of the shade an yet the menace of the years finds an shall find me unafraid it matters not how strait the gate how charged with punishments the scroll I am the master of my fate I am the captain of my soul

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 05:49 AM
jeremy_binx is offline Click Here to See the Profile for jeremy_binx Click here to Send jeremy_binx a Private Message Find more posts by jeremy_binx Add jeremy_binx to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
SocialParasite
wallet.dat is where it at

Registered: Jul 2000
Location: fuck you daaaaaaaaad
Posts: 24496

Then somebody will do you a tremendous favor and take away your ability to use periods............................................................

__________________

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 07-23-2009 05:58 AM
SocialParasite is offline Click Here to See the Profile for SocialParasite Click here to Send SocialParasite a Private Message Find more posts by SocialParasite Add SocialParasite to your buddy list [P] Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
All times are GMT. The time now is 06:21 PM. Post New Thread    Post A Reply
Pages (2): [1] 2 »   Last Thread   Next Thread
Show Printable Version | Email this Page | Subscribe to this Thread

Forum Jump:
 

Forum Rules:
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is ON
vB code is ON
Smilies are ON
[IMG] code is ON
 

< Contact Us - The Asylum >

Copyright © 2014- Imaginet Inc.
[Legal Notice] | [Privacy Policy] | [Site Index]