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J E B Stuart
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Transfiguration (2017)

I watched this at home last night. Rotten ‘maters gives it 85%, although the audience score is just 51%. Perhaps the most telling tidbit is that the box office cume in limited release was a whopping $21,926 (sarcasm intended).

I generally watch a flick hoping to be entertained. This movie is slow, dull, mildly depressing and not in an entertaining way. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-11-2018 07:12 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Re: Re: The Strangers: Prey at Night (2018)

quote:
Originally posted by plum
Try doing this with Lake Mungo (2008)
Tried to find it on Netflix a few days ago. Drew a blank.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-16-2018 05:13 PM
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plum
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Registered: Jan 2004
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I'm not a big horror fan, but this is one of the few I've kept on my hard drive over the past ten years, since it scared me more than any other film- even going all the way back through my teen years and into childhood- and did this without resorting to jump- scares. Kind of embarrassing to admit, but when I finished watching it (at around 2 am) I had to brew some serious coffee so I could stay awake until dawn...

If you just torrented it like everyone else I don't think the makers of the film would hunt you down from Australia. On the contrary, they would appreciate the exposure for this little known gem.

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Old Post 03-16-2018 11:59 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Ha! I’m at the theatre, comfortably seated in the middle of the 5th row from the screen, getting ready to view Unsane.

It’d better be good, or I’ll show ‘em unsane.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-23-2018 10:31 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Unsane (2018)

I saw Unsane yesterday afternoon. It was pretty danged good. In fact, it should be an Official Selection of The Asylumnation Film Festival. As is nearly always the case, there is no reason to pay retail for this, unless you’re on, say, a date night and need to show your date what a big spender you are. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-24-2018 04:18 PM
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GoFuckYourselves!
#1 Asylum Dumbfuck!

Registered: Oct 2000
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Do you talk to, or yell at, the screen? I do--but only before the movie starts.

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Old Post 03-24-2018 04:21 PM
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J E B Stuart
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No. I’m afraid it would talk back and that just wouldn’t be right.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-24-2018 04:24 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Thoroughbreds (2018)

I saw Thoroughbreds a few nights ago. Glad I did. It’s seriously messed up in a very good movie way. Sick, or psycho? As a side note, this was one of Anton Yelchin’s last movies. He died in 2016 in a freak accident. He carried himself very well in this one. I think I also read somewhere that this flick’s budget was a whopping $500,000.

I’m not saying you should pay retail to see this li’l gem. But, you won’t feel robbed if you do. Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-25-2018 04:28 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Intruders (2016)

I watched Intruders today, thanks to a free SHOtime preview. Interestingly, it did not fare so well on either side of the RT ratings fence (critics v. audience). Well, I rather enjoyed it. Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-26-2018 02:42 AM
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Coincidence
Counterfeit

Registered: Apr 2004
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Annihilation.

Nicely trippy.
Of course, since it has to be a grown up and relevant film, it's all metaphors for cancer and destruction. I want another movie like this, just with everything being awesome. 7/10

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Old Post 03-26-2018 08:09 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Ready Player One (2018)

I saw RPO in 3D yesterday. It’s pretty entertaining, although it’s not one I expect to ever watch, again. It explores interesting, though not original, questions that arise as the line between VR and RL dissolves

Although I saw it in 3D, it seems to me that 3D is rarely, if ever, worth the additional fee for the “3D technology” rental. I’ve also noticed that the screen time theatres dedicate to 3D showings appears to be decreasing.

I didn’t see any reason to pay retail. Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

Last edited by J E B Stuart on 03-30-2018 at 06:10 PM

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Old Post 03-30-2018 05:22 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Bloodsucking Bastards (2015)

I just watched this vampire office comedy grasshoppa-style. Not nearly as good as the RT critics think, but it’s okay if you’ve got some time to kill. Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 03-31-2018 04:31 PM
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Coincidence
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Three Billboards outside Ebbing, Missouri.

Very good. American white males ftw. 7.9/10

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Old Post 04-02-2018 02:17 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up First Kill (2017)

I watched First Kill grasshoppa-style. Funny thing - the critics clobbered it and the audience score wasn’t much better. Bruce Willis without a rug is in this, although he is not the headliner. In fact, his role coulda been easily played by someone else without the flick missing a beat.

I enjoyed, although I doubt I would’ve liked it as much had I paid retail. Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-03-2018 02:01 AM
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Large Filipino
Fuck me hard in my arse.

Registered: Feb 2004
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Easily a 95.
Then add 5 for Godzilla.
I enjoyed this.

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I want a Trump sex doll.
I would throw it in a Orangutan enclosure
And watch the orgy.

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Old Post 04-04-2018 06:07 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up A Quiet Place (2018)

i watched AQP this evening. I paid retail. I was a bit skeptical because the critics have almost unanimously certified it fresh. But, I must say I wholeheartedly agree with them this time. It’s a really good film.

Here’s a link.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-06-2018 04:27 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Well. I am going to watch “Blockers”. Why? Because I want to.

I think they wanted to name it “Cock Blockers”, but then Trump got elected. It’s his fault.

Amen.

__________________
" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-07-2018 12:40 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Blockers (2018)

As promised, I saw Cock Blockers. Yes, it is advertised as “Blockers”, but make no mistake - this flick is about blockers of the Johnson.

I am happy to report that this film is ridiculously hilarious. One of the most unexpected surprises was John Cena. He was superbly funny. If you have kids, or if you are still a kid (like me) and have/had parents who love/loved you but sometimes drove you nuts, Cock Blockers is for you.

I haven’t given Freds in awhile. This gem gets 4 outta 4 Fred’s. Here’s a Cock Block link.

Amen.

p.s. HAHAAAHAHAHAAA!!! Lordy, it was hard holding that in long enough to write this stellar review.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-08-2018 08:59 PM
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Coincidence
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Finding Dory.

Stupid. But I laughed three times. 3/10

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Old Post 04-10-2018 05:59 PM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Rampage (2018)

I saw this lastest Dwayne Johnson showcase Sunday evening. I even sprung for 3D. I went in with low expectations. I left feeling very pleasantly surprised. This was a fun movie, tailor-made for the big screen. I’ll call it Godzirra on steroids. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-17-2018 05:21 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

I saw AIW a few hours ago. In 3D. It’s good. Unlike Black Panther, it has abundant humor and wisecracking. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 04-28-2018 08:23 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Bad Samaritan (2018)

I saw BS last night. Good, entertaining flick. And, as far as I could tell, there wasn’t a single Hollywood asshole in the cast. But, as is nearly always the case, there is no reason to pay retail to see this. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 05-05-2018 03:29 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up Home Alone 3 (1997)

I’m at home alone right now. Coincidentally, a free viewing of HA3 came on, so I watched it. The only thing different about this one from the preceding HAs is the cast. That said, I enjoyed the silly and preposterous cinematic Mousetrap Game hijincks.

An interesting side note is that a preteen Scarlett Johansson has a minor supporting role as Kevin’s older sister. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 05-05-2018 06:40 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Hard Sell (2016)

I watched this grasshoppa-style earlier today. I’d never heard of it. It was alright, but I could also see why I’d never heard of it. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 05-06-2018 02:55 AM
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J E B Stuart
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Thumbs up The Rollong Stones Rock and Roll Circus

I just watched this. I’d never heard of it. What a treat! Although it was released in 1996, all the footage is 1968. Stones. Jethro Tull. The Who. Much, much more. Here’s a link.

Amen.

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" Future years will never know the seething hell and the black infernal background of countless minor scenes and interiors, (not the official surface courteousness of the Generals, not the few great battles) of the Secession war; and it is best they should not�the real war will never get in the books." ~ Walt Whitman

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Old Post 05-07-2018 06:42 AM
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